J is for Jokes

So I spend my day surrounded by kids and kids love to tell jokes. I don’t always get the jokes and sometimes that’s because they don’t really make sense. But I laugh anyway.

Here is a selection of some that do make sense. I warn you, though, most of them were told to me by third graders so there is a pretty big groan factor. Enjoy!

How do you make a tissue dance?  /   You put a little boogey in it!

Why do fish live in salt water?   /    Because pepper makes them sneeze!

What do you get when you cross a fish with an elephant?   /  Swimming trunks!

Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom?   /   Because the “p” is silent!

Why was 6 afraid of 7?  /   Because 7…8….9!

What do you call cheese that doesn’t belong to you?  /  Nacho cheese!

What do you call a sea gull who flies over the bay?  /  A bagel!

Okay, now run out and find an 8 year old to tell them to. I guarantee you’ll get a laugh!

My Classroom is Under Water

Okay, it’s not really under water. It’s just very, very, very damp. The water has since receded. It always does eventually. This is what happens when you work on the lower level (read “basement”) of a school built in 1923. I’ve worked in this classroom for nine years with a very gifted, and very patient special education teacher. This is the fourth time in those nine years that the classroom has flooded. Each time matience attempts to fix the problem, dries out the carpet and we move back in. Each time this wonderful teacher loses more of her materials to water damage, most of which she has purchased with her own money.

This, most recent flood was the worst yet and the principal has put her foot down. We will not be moving back in until a professional is brought in to fix the problem for good. If you Understand how slowly things move in the public school system, then you know that we will not be moving back in during this school year.

In the meantime, we have been shuffled sideways into a smaller windowsless classroom that was occupied by our reading specialist, (she is now working in the conference room off the main office). The contents of our classroom are piled in boxes along one wall and down the hallway. The 8 second and third graders that come and go during the day usually sit on the floor for lessons because there aren’t enought desks or chairs for all of them.

Sound like fun? Our new mantra has become “It is what it is”. We have to sit on the floor with clip boards? Let’s pretend we’re camping! We need to search through the boxes for a book? Let’s call it a treasure hunt! We need to go out in the hall to have room to play a game? It’s a field trip!!! Each day has become an adventure all its own! But there is still learning going on and that’s the important thing, right? Not only are these children keeping up with their math and reading but they are also learning the science of adaptability! The art of making do!  The language of simplification!  That’s actually a pretty cool thing!

Grade School the Second Time Around

I make a living as a teacher’s aide. It’s a great job, very fulfilling and a lot of fun. However, I have come to realize that there are many things that I have either forgotten or never learned during my first tenure in elementary school. Everyday I find myself saying “Really? I never knew that!” Now, maybe these little gems of knowledge are not going to be a surprise to some of you but, hey, they made my day more interesting! So here is the first installment of GSTSTA (see title). I will continue to enlighten you periodically! 😊

  • Sound does not travel in space.
  • There are more craters on the near side of the moon than on the far side.
  • There are 17 varieties of penguins 
  • All penguins live in the Southern Hemisphere and some live in very warm climates like Africa and Chile.